Why This Pain?
by Ivy Tante
Summary: Reflections on Aragorn as he leaves on the Quest. Part Three; Elrohir's thoughts.
1. Elrond

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything remotely belonging to Tolkien, so no disrespect is intended toward his wonderful work by the short vignette I have written._

_**Summary:** Just a brief, attempted look into the minds of Elrond, Elladan, Elrohir, Arwen, and Glorfindel of Imladris as the Fellowship leaves for Mordor. Based loosely on the loving relationship between the Elven Lord and his foster son featured so prominently in the 'Mellon Chronicles' by Cassia and Siobhan._  


'Why This Pain?' 

By Ivy Tanté  


Part One; Elrond… 

Gazing into the newly risen dawn, Elrond of Imladris struggled to conceal his emotions. Beneath him, marching in solemn procession, the Fellowship of the Ring began its epic journey. Nine defenders pitted against the might of Sauron, led by Gandalf the Grey. But it was the black-clad figure trailing behind the great wizard that held Elrond's attention. 

The Noldor Elf did not understand the feeling of utter helplessness that besieged him at the sight of Aragorn leaving. The mortal was doing as he must, as fate had destined he would. Aragorn had taken the first step to claiming the true heritage Elrond had strove to teach him. Yet it hurt to release him. Hurt in ways the Elven Lord was little prepared to handle. It ate at his resolve, eroded away the courage and strength of will that had sustained him for all the eons of his life. 

_'Why this pain?'_ The bleak, unanswered question rose up to smite him as the Fellowship disappeared into the distance. It reverberated through his being, leaving tingling trails of fear and doubt in its wake. For the first time, the mortal was truly shorn of the Elven Lord's protection and guidance. 

Elrond remained standing on the balcony, letting the morning sun gilt his features and paint vivid red streaks into his dark brown hair. Yet he did not see the golden glow that surrounded him, did not feel the warmth of a new day building. Instead his thoughts returned, over and over, to the monumental events of the past few hours. 

Well he remembered his argument with Aragorn in the stillness of pre-dawn. Kneeling at his mother's grave, the man had seemed so vulnerable, almost lost. Duty required Elrond to remind Aragorn of the fate that awaited him, but the father's heart within balked at the task. Aragorn bore much upon his shoulders, to burden him further seemed cruel. But duty won, forcing the Elven Lord to bear home the unwelcome truth; Aragorn, son of Arathorn, heir of Isildur -- he alone could reunite the scattered factions of Men. But it was a power Aragorn did not wish to wield. 

The further words spoken burned within him still. Instead of voicing his concern for Aragorn's safety, he had pleaded once more for the freedom of Arwen Evenstar. Shame withered his pride as he recalled the harsh reality of his words. Surely Aragorn believed his fate of little importance compared to that of Arwen. So the Dúnedain had left Imladris, bound on a journey from which he might never return, leaving behind a father who had not remembered to speak of the love that lay within his heart. 

The Lord of Rivendell continued to stare into the distance, ignoring the tears that dripped rhythmically from his eyes. The haunting question _'Why this pain?'_ echoed in his thoughts, hammering away at the serenity of his surroundings. He had just sent his son into almost certain doom for the sake of Middle-Earth, and the agony seemed worse with each passing second. 

_'Why this pain?'_ then? Because you are _Estel_, Aragorn. You are my hope.  



	2. Elladan

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything remotely belonging to Tolkien, so no disrespect is intended toward his wonderful work by the short vignette I have written._

**Summary:** Just a brief, attempted look into the minds of Elrond, Elladan, Elrohir, Arwen, and Glorfindel of Imladris as the Fellowship leaves for Mordor. Based loosely on the loving relationship between the Elven Lord and his foster son featured so prominently in the 'Mellon Chronicles' by Cassia and Siobhan.

'Why This Pain?'  
By Ivy Tante

Part Two: Elladan 

Grief roared through Elladan Elrondion as he watched Aragorn disappear into the ravine. Grief, resentment, and anger. Aragorn was more than just a foster brother to him; he was a ray of light and hope that brightened his days and reminded the Elf of the world outside the secure borders of Rivendell. Thus his leaving drove pain and fear deep within Elladan. 

The grief was the simple parting of brothers, but the resentment directed toward his father held far deeper meaning. To his thinking, Elrond should never have allowed the mortal upon the quest to destroy the One Ring. Aragorn's fate was too uncertain as it stood to add such a dangerous endeavor. And so the anger festered, driving a deep wedge of disagreement between father and son that had never existed before. 

Ignoring the almost blinding light of the new day, Elladan considered the wisdom of taking off pell-mell after the Ranger. In complete disregard to his bleak mood, the image of the Lord of Imladris staring in stunned disbelief as his eldest twin son calmly strolled back into the Last Homely House bearing upon his back the struggling, cursing Aragorn assaulted him. A smile tugged at his lips, bringing light into his gray eyes -- light only his mortal brother could kindle to flaming life. 

The thought made those eyes close in resigned pain. The proud head dropped, spilling chestnut brown hair across his shoulders and down his arms. Fire seemed to erupt as the early morning sun blazed upon him, igniting highlights buried within every strand. Unbidden came his father's voice: _"Aragorn, son of Arathorn, heir of Isildur -- he is the only hope left to the race of Men. To deny him the chance, however fleeting it might be, of uniting the scattered factions of Men will mean the end of the world."_

"I know, _Ada_. But it hurts so to release him." The words hung in the crisp autumn air for long moments as the Elf struggled to contain himself. Well he remembered Elrond's tortured question of, _"Why this pain?"_ No answers had come forth during the late night 'discussion', but the bright light of day forced the truth into almost brutal clarity. 

Long had Elladan known and wondered at the joy the human brought into his life. Now that joy was needed elsewhere, and he was not willing to sever his connection to it for the sake of a world that had done little to deserve it. To release Aragorn to his destiny meant loosing part of himself, and Elladan was afraid he might never regain that part should his mortal brother die upon the quest to destroy the One Ring. 

Slowly the slumped shoulders straightened. Elrond had found the strength to let Aragorn go, and so would he, though it felt like a dagger in his heart. Whatever the outcome, the bright memories would always be there to comfort him. Aragorn's laughter would always resound in the corridors of Imladris, just as his love would always reside in his Elven family's heart. 

Then _'Why this pain?'_

Because you are _Estel_, Aragorn. You bring to life an emotion we thought long extinct, and give it to the world while keeping none for yourself.  
  
  



	3. Elrohir

**_Disclaimer:_**_ I do not own anything remotely belonging to Tolkien, so no disrespect is intended toward his wonderful work by the short vignette I have written._

**_Summary:_**_ Just a brief, attempted look into the minds of Elrond, Elladan, Elrohir, Arwen, and Glorfindel of Imladris as the Fellowship leaves for Mordor. Based loosely on the loving relationship between the Elven Lord and his foster son featured so prominently in the 'Mellon Chronicles' by Cassia and Siobhan._

'Why This Pain?'

By Ivy Tante

Part Three: Elrohir

Standing beneath an ivy-covered archway, Elrohir Elrondion watched with mixed emotions as the Fellowship left Imladris. While he understood the reasons behind the journey, he admitted privately to himself that he did not agree with all of them. The One Ring must be destroyed -- that was not in doubt. That the task had fallen to a Hobbit to carry the Ring -- surprising, yes, but not in contention. That the heir of Isildur, the son of the Steward of Gondor, and the Crown Prince of Mirkwood should accompany him -- _ah_, therein lay the problem.

So much depended on Aragorn, Boromir, and Legolas. But perhaps such an endeavor by such a diverse group could benefit Middle-Earth; too long had the races stood alone; too long had the silence been given reign. Perhaps this shared peril might break through the barriers created by time and distance.

_But must Aragorn pay such a cost?_ The thought was bleak and unforgiving. Elrond had demanded that Aragorn release Arwen to the West, and the Ranger had done so. Elrohir's tunic was still stained with the tears she shed while repeating the mortal's words. Words of hope, of a life without strife or war or pain. Yet his eyes had been dead, the life within them shadowed and haunted as he pushed aside the love he felt for Arwen and did the duty commanded by his father.

_Why this pain?_

The question lingered in the very air of Imladris as Lord Elrond began to retrace his steps toward the Last Homely House. Hugging himself tighter, Elrohir drew further beneath the protecting shadow of ivy as his father's forlorn figure passed. The proud head was bent, the gray eyes narrowed in pain, the eyebrows furrowed. The dejection that surrounded Elrond Peredhil dimmed the bright morning sun, turned the perfect complexion gray with fatigue and strain. For the first time Elrohir began to realize just what the word 'sacrifice' meant.

Aragorn was doing what he must, what he was fated to do. Elrond, in releasing him, was also fulfilling the role given to him when he offered shelter to his ever-so-great nephew. Arwen was Elven-kind, born to return to Valinor in the West. _But he is my brother!_ Elrohir claimed savagely within his heart. A brother raised in love, taught with love, guided with love. Why must a man more Elven than not be the saving grace of a race that had done little to deserve such salvation?

Emerging from the shadows, Elrohir faced the beginning day, tilting his head back slightly. The morning sun gilded his skin a glowing gold, his hair a vivid fiery nimbus surrounding features etched with pain and confusion. He believed in Aragorn, trusted his judgment, relied on his strength of will to carry him to whatever ends might come. But that did not stop him from mourning the loss of his spirit, however temporary the separation might be.

_Why this pain_, then?

Because you are _Estel_, Aragorn. You are my light in a world growing cold with shadow.


End file.
